Caption Contest

Previous contest winner

WINNER: Matt Judkins: Forgive me Ron Corleone, I don't want to sleep with the fishes like the Hamburglar.

In Praise of Ewoks

[YouTube Link] A sweet and romantic song extolling the virtues of Ewoks.

HT: Neatorama

Your Sins Will Find You Out

First Jim Morrow and now Theresa Coleman is airing my dirty laundry.

Calling and Happiness

Over the years and from various corners, I have heard this bit of proverbial wisdom:

"You should only go into the ordained ministry if you can't imagine yourself doing anything else."

I think that this is an unhealthy perspective to maintain. If you are an ordained minister or are otherwise working full-time in lay ministry, there will be days in your life when you can easily imagine yourself doing something else. I have certainly had days in the past year of my first pastorate when I have looked upon my former career as a librarian with fondness, if not envy.

To expect that every day in ministry will be so filled with elation that the minister cannot imagine doing anything else is an unrealistic and unachievable standard for happiness. For that matter, it's not even Biblical. Take, for example, the ministry of Elijah. He was a faithful prophet who proclaimed the Word of God to kings and empires. But even in the wake of tremendous victory, he could feel despair of God's call on his life:

But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a solitary broom tree. He asked that he might die: ‘It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my ancestors.’ (1 Kin 19:4 NRSV)

Jeremiah likewise expressed misery in his own ministry in the final days of Judah’s independence. He even went so far as to question God’s integrity in calling him:

Why is my pain unceasing, my wound incurable, refusing to be healed? Truly, you are to me like a deceitful brook, like waters that fail. (Jer 15:18 NRSV)

Hosea was ordered to marry a prostitute. Jonah physically fled from his call. Surely these ministers had days in which they could imagine doing some other line of work than ministry! Shall we, then, hold ourselves to be greater than the prophets of the Lord?

Those of us who serve in full-time ministry or are preparing to do not do so because we find it blissful.

We do so because we are called.

Caption Contest

Previous contest winner

WINNER: Jeff the Baptist:

That's what they get for teasing the Prophet Elisha during his backswing.

Practical Romance

Via the brilliantly-named blog June Cleaver After a Six-Pack

A Cry for Help

Jim Morrow tries to read my mind.

Sin for Fun and Profit

Leviticus 6:24-26:

Then the LORD spoke to Moses, saying, "Speak to Aaron and to his sons, saying, 'This is the law of the sin offering: in the place where the burnt offering is slain the sin offering shall be slain before the LORD; it is most holy. The priest who offers it for sin shall eat it. It shall be eaten in a holy place, in the court of the tent of meeting."

One of the curious things I've noticed whilst reading the Pentateuch is that it is in the financial best interests of the Levites for people to sin.

Old McCarthyist Propaganda

Gavin Richardson sent me this piece of propaganstic trash from the 1950s which equates fear of zombie attacks with Communist sympathies.

[YouTube Link] It's really sad that we were once so blind to the zombie menace. It's a wonder that we ever survived the Cold War.

HT: Newscoma

Caption Contest

Previous contest winner

WINNER: Kelly Moore: One of the lesser known episodes where the Wayne family learns to deal with Bat-divorce-settlements.

Methodist Blogger Profile: Ken Lowery

Ken Lowery of UM Reporter Blog

I am new in everything—new to the Reporter (I’m the copy editor and put the Resources pages together), and new to the United Methodist Church… at least as an official member. I have to pretend this gives me a unique angle, because if it doesn’t, what in the world do I have to blog about?

Why do you blog?
Like most bloggers, I'm exhibitionist in my thinking; the thought process somehow isn't 'real' unless others have seen it and have a chance to react. There's also that vital need to be part of 'the Conversation,' whether that conversation be about movies, comic books, or Methodism.

What has been your best blogging experience?
No singular great moment, just a series of small nice ones over the years. I’ve made some lasting friends and gotten some vindication. It turns out that there are other people who do care about this stuff as much as I do, even moreso. This is very comforting.

What would be your main advice to a novice blogger?
It's true: There's nothing new under the sun. Everything anyone says has been said a thousand times before. You aren't going to shake the pillars of Heaven with your Bold New Ideas . . . But what you DO bring to the table, what no one else in the history of the world has or will have, is your voice. Have something to say, and say it in the way that only you can.

If you could read only three blogs a day?
progressiveruin.com - Mike is a comic book shop manager and a very, very funny man. He makes me laugh every single day, and has done so for years.

blogs.suntimes.com/scanners - The best conversations about movies on the internet, bar none. Scanners invigorates my love for movies and does a pretty good job of indicating how little I truly know about anything. This, too, can be invigorating.

UMR blog – They pay me!

Who are your spiritual heroes?
Oh, dear. Off the top of my head (and perhaps because it’s topical), Martin Luther King, Jr., and Malcolm X. Both my parents were teenagers in Birmingham throughout the bulk of the 60’s, and their stories about that time and place never fail to floor me. I think if I can be half as brave as these men when it really matters, I will have made something of myself.

What are you reading at the moment?
Testament, by Douglas Rushkoff, Liam Sharp, et al. It’s a comic about the cyclical nature of Biblical stories and about how those stories are lived out every day. Rushkoff juxtaposes retellings of the original Biblical stories with his own versions set in a technology-dominated near-future. The concept is better than the execution, but I’m still fascinated.

What is your favorite hymn and why?
“Silent Night.” I don’t care if it counts! Christmas music has always been my favorite Christian music.

Can you name a major moral, political, or intellectual issue on which you've ever changed your mind?
The death penalty. In my heady youth (mid-adolescence) I was for it. As I got nearer 20 I was for it, but only in very special circumstances. Now, I cannot conceive of how I ever thought capital punishment was a good idea.

What philosophical thesis do you think is most important to combat?
Objectivism. Its nominally “good” points often don’t survive contact with reality; what remains is just a high-minded justification for selfishness and lack of empathy. The world has enough of that already; we don’t need to give the selfish a big vocabulary and self-righteousness on top of everything else.

If you could effect one major change in the governing of your country, what would it be?
Campaign finance reform, in a major way. It’s apparently an unhip thing to be upset about, but I don’t understand how massive campaign contributions from large entities aren’t seen as advertising, not to mention a terrible conflict of interest in one of the most important arenas in the world. The candidates might as well NASCAR jackets.

If you could effect one major policy change in the United Methodist Church, what would it be?
I don’t feel learned enough in the church to say something intelligent here, but… if we’re going to be calling our policies “open doors,” we should behave as such.

What would be your most important piece of advice about life?
1 Corinthians 12. For myself, and for others. It’s a good reminder.

The passage first struck me, of all places, in the TV show Deadwood. The Reverend H.W. Smith (based on a real-life person, and a Methodist at that) reads the King James version of that passage at the funeral of Wild Bill Hicock, specifically verses 16 through 27.

In the show it’s meant to signal a transition from the “Wild West” of lone, legendary figures into a more complex tapestry from which 20th century American society will emerge. To me, it was one of the final pieces of the puzzle that gave me greater awareness of the people around me. Best 30-second sermon I’ve ever heard, let me tell you.

What, if anything, do you worry about?
Relevance. Having anything new or insightful (or even just entertaining) to add to the conversation, be that in blogging, work, or with friends. I want to be worth the space I take up.

If you were to relive your life to this point, is there anything that you'd do differently?
Oof. Obviously yes, and obviously no. I like where I am, so I wouldn’t want to change anything and risk not being where I’m at as the person I am. At the same time . . . know what I mean?

Where would you most like to live (other than where you do now)?
Chicago, or possibly Boston. I love cities, and I’ve found I love East Coast-style cities the most. I could walk around that town and get lost forever. Now, mind you, I haven’t been to either during a hard winter . . .

What do you like doing in your spare time?
I wish I was James Bond when it came to questions like this, but: Read blogs, read books, watch movies in a variety of venues, play video games with friends, try out new restaurants, write. Ladies, line up to the left.

What is your most treasured possession?
Most used: My computer. Most treasured: My cat Bean. She’s not technically my “possession,” of course… she would argue it’s more like the other way around.

What talent would you most like to have?
I wish I could draw, paint, sculpt, just do something in the visual arts. Visiting museums is a wonderful experience, but I also burn with envy. I’m just not a visual thinker.

If you could have any three guests, past or present, to dinner, who would they be?
Yearbook answer, since I recently listened to a lecture on this very topic: Jesus and Buddha, moderated by Socrates.

Real answer: Bill Hicks, early-80’s John Carpenter, and Kurt Loder. I’ve never claimed to be a sophisticated person, but tell me that wouldn’t be a great dinner party.

Methodist Blogs Weekly Roundup #154

...is up.

The Humor of Habakkuk

Jared at Thinklings has a good post up about the implicit humor in the Book of Habakkuk, as well as an exploration of Habakkuk's example of faith:

I'm trying to be humorous with that nutshell summation, and Habakkuk's faith is actually remarkable in that he continues to faithfully acknowledge God's goodness and holiness and righteousness even in the expectation of pain and suffering, but that is really the gist. God has an agenda, and it is not ours.

I've long treasured the third chapter of Habakkuk as one of the hidden gems of Scripture. It takes quite a bit of unpacking homiletically, but it is a very powerful expression of faith in the midst of disaster.

Correction and Clarification

For a few weeks, I've had a label in the sidebar of my blog that says "This Blog is 100% Zombie Proof". In the interest in public safety, I've decided to take it down.

In truth, you are never, ever completely safe from zombies. Adopting the attitude that one's domicile, blog, or workplace is 100% zombie-proof induces a sense of complacency. It can be easy to build a 20 foot high brick wall around one's home and stockpile food, ammunition, and medical supplies. And one can also build self-sustaining energy and water sources. But even the most well-prepared and equipped compounds have fallen to the undead hordes, and so claiming to be completely safe from zombies really conveys a false sense of security.

I realize that, although my home may be largely safe from zombies, by suggesting that it is completely safe, I may be unintentionally suggesting to loyal readers who look up to me as a role model that zombie defense is easily managed. If I have conveyed this erroneous view, I apologize. In this act, I failed in my responsibility to you.

I further realize that my advertising my blog as 100% zombie-proof, I may be encouraging readers to seek refuge with me when the armies of the undead consume humanity. Hence my Internet pseudonymity. For those who were counting on my help when the Great Panic finally comes, I'm sorry: my family will be my only priority at that point. I will protect my wife, dog, and rabbit, but you're on your own.

So, in summary, I would urge you, dear readers, not to put off your preparations for a zombie attack until the last minute. Because when they come, you'll have to look out for yourself.

The Kosher Guide to Imaginary Animals

Can you eat a hobbit in accordance with kosher law? The authors of this post address that question and the kosher-ness of other fanciful creatures.

As for hobbits, they say 'no' on the basis of that creature's sentience. But I don't recall that being a requirement of kosher. Perhaps Jewish readers will correct me. Meanwhile, I'm being getting the deep fryer hot.

HT: Neatorama

Question of the Day

I previously mentioned that three of the pre-set radio stations in my truck are to NPR -- variously Jacksonville, Gainesville, and Orlando. As I drive across Florida to seminary and back, I generally rotate as a signal dies and a new one emerges. I don't always agree with what's said on NPR, but I rarely feel stupider after having listened to it.

What is your favorite NPR show?
	All Things Considered
	Fresh Air
	Morning Edition
	Wait, Wait...Don't Tell Me
	The Diane Rehm Show
	Marketplace
	A Prairie Home Companion
	Car Talk
	This American Life
pollcode.com free polls

I used to really like This American Life, but haven't listened to it in years due to scheduling conflicts. So if I had to choose, I'd say Terry Gross' Fresh Air.

Death in the Methoblogosphere

Cub has passed on. Give you condolences to Amy.

Question of the Day

Surely you're not going to wear that to church, are you?

Caption Contest

Previous contest winners

WINNER: Matt Judkins: In a lesser known, but no less important, episode from Jesus' life, he chases the liturgical dancers from the temple.

Every "He's Dead, Jim" Line from Classic Star Trek

[Video Link]

Also, William Shatner and the Arkansas Symphony Orchestra are releasing a dramatic reading/spoken word album of the Book of Exodus.

HT: Ace

What If The Western High Noon Was a Sci-Fi Film?

[YouTube Link] HT: Neatorama

Accountability and appointments

For the last few years I have been hearing more and more buzz around the idea of doing away with the UM practice of gauranteed appointments for ordained elders, especially to make it easier to deal with ineffective clergy.

I wonder what the measurement of effectiveness would be? Part of me wants to reject a relativistic answer and have some kind of clear definition of what constitutes clergy effectiveness. It could be church growth, professions of faith, great programs, paying apportionments - whatever - just something so that everybody understands the rules of the "effectiveness" game. However, the side of me that is trying to pastor in the real world is starting to convince me that the answer has to be, "It depends - it depends on the community, on the laity, on the history of the congregation, on demographics, etc." How do you take into account all the necessary variables to judge effectiveness of a pastor within a specific appointment?

Which Transformer Are You?

Which Transformer Are You created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Megatron Your only goal in life is to kill humans, and Autobots. Especially your brother Optimus Prime. If it wasn't for him Earth would be your home away from home. YOu have a considerable amount of envy. Megatron 92% Barricade 83% Ironhide 83% Blackout 67% Frenzy 67% Scorponok 67% Ratchet 67% Starscream 58% Bonecrusher 50% Jazz 50% Optimus Prime 33% Bumblebee 17%

The Church in Second Life

I've been visiting the church that Theresa Coleman built in Second Life. Here's an aerial shot of the sanctuary:


And here's a look inside:


This is the adjoining meetinghouse:


This is a cozy small-group area on the second floor of the meeting house:


If you want to meet me in SL, my avatar's name is Johan Kessel.

The (Un)Holiness of Asbury Theological Seminary

Jim Morrow, blogger and Asbury student, has responded to Jeremy Smith's quantitative study revealing that Asbury is the least holy UMC seminary. Unfortunately, Jim has responded by rigging a formula of questionable validity in order to prove that Asbury is the most holy seminary. It is largely derived from the consumption of coffee and the specific density of textbooks (the former of which would make me angelic, and the latter I think would hand the contest to Duke Divinity School). What what would I know, as Jim refers to me as "snarky and childish"?

A Funny Transformers Redub

[YouTube Link] The Decepticons' most insidious scheme yet. True evil is afoot. By James Zahn; 2 minutes long.

Accountability and Anonymity in the Age of the Internet

Tim Challies:

Many bloggers and other Internet users value anonymity. A blog is understood by some to be a place of refuge and safety—a place where a person can post what is on his mind and on his heart while revealing little about who he truly is. It is a place to let loose with the anger and frustration. It is a place where a person can speak out to other people and about other people without ever having to look those people in the eye. If every sailor is a bachelor beyond Gibraltar, we could as easily say that every blogger is a pundit or a curmudgeon or an expert or a righteous man when in front of his keyboard.

Guinness says that, in former days, morality was accountability through visibility. Yet today many of us are able to remain invisible. Not too long ago I was an invisible blogger. In some ways I valued my anonymity, and yet I knew that it could be a danger. I wrote a lot and my site was read by many people, but all the while I was safely removed from the people I wrote for and wrote about. I began to see the effect of this in my writing. It became increasingly abrasive and showed a distinct lack of character. But a couple of years ago, by the grace of God, things began to change. By live-blogging conferences I had to emerge from my home office and meet many of the people who read this site and whose sites I read. This has been, in every case, a tremendous blessing. At the same time I made changes to my life, even going so far as to begin attending a new church where I could come face-to-face each week with people who would encourage or exhort me as necessary. I deliberately sought people who could challenge me and keep an eye on whatever ministry opportunities arise from my writing.

I always operate under the assumption that my blog is read in its entirety by my DS, congregation, and Board of Ordained Ministry.

HT: Brett Royal

Asbury Theological Seminary is the Least Holy UMC Seminary

Okay, strictly speaking, Asbury is not a UMC institution, even though it produces more UMC pastors than any other seminary.

Still, Jeremy Smith runs the numbers through a formula and reaches an inevitable conclusion. Go ahead, check his figures. The math all checks out. Garrett-Evangelical is at the top of the holiness index and Asbury at the bottom.

I ran across Smith's blog only a few days ago, but I'm really impressed with his work. Keep an eye out on this blogger. He's going places.

HT: John Meunier

What Is Your Theological Worldview?

I've retaken the Theological Worldview Test, and these were the results:

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan: 93%
Emergent/Postmodern: 82%
Charismatic/Pentecostal: 68%
Neo orthodox: 64%
Classical Liberal: 61%
Reformed Evangelical: 57%
Fundamentalist: 43%
Roman Catholic: 39%
Modern Liberal: 25%

I take this test every year, and these were my results two years ago:

Evangelical Holiness/Wesleyan: 93%
Charismatic/Pentecostal: 71%
Neo orthodox: 68%
Fundamentalist: 61%
Classical Liberal: 54%
Reformed Evangelical: 54%
Emergent/Postmodern: 50%
Roman Catholic: 43%
Modern Liberal: 36%

So the major change over the past two years is that I have become far more Postmodern. I figured that this might happen after writing theology essays for commissioning in the past few weeks. I found that my concept of the Kingdom of God, life in community, and evangelism were heavily derived from Brian McLaren and N.T. Wright.

After more than 2 and 1/2 years in seminary, I recently asked my wife if she had spotted any major changes in my theology. She said, "Many people go to seminary and stop believing in Jesus. I was worried about that when you started school. But you went to seminary and started believing in social justice."

I think that that's true. It's a libertarian vision of social justice, but it's definitely social justice. I'm far less inclined to conceptualize salvation as individualistic and holiness as personal and now more likely to emphasize the transformation of entire societies into the Kingdom of God. I'm also inclined to envision evangelism as incarnational and outreach as central to Christian life.

Much of this change in my thinking can be attributed to two spiritual mentors, Hugo Magallanes and Brian Russell.

Caption Contest

Previous contest winner

WINNERS:

DannyG: We're from the D.O.T. and we're here to help you!

Larry: A visual representation of the UM ordination process

Truevyne: Looks like my gps instructions when I'm driving through Atlanta.

Ad-Blockers on Web Browsers

Alex at Neatorama asks if ad-blocking software constitutes thievery by depriving the websites that you visit of revenues:

Do you think blocking ads is equivalent to thievery?

What do you think?

The God of Atrocities

Dan Trabue attempts to understand the loving character of God in the light of divinely-mandated atrocities in the Old Testament:

Now, I don’t think that God is atrocious. I think those OT passages that have God committing or commanding acts that are elsewhere condemned in the Bible (and indeed, are condemned by our own conscience – I think that it is within our own reasoning and soul that SOME acts are just wrong – killing children, kidnapping girls/young women to make them your wives – some actions are just wrong. Period.) need to be understood as a representation of God as the author understood God. NOT as a perfect understanding of God to be taken literally.

Clearly, I think, God is not in the atrocity business. I find it amazing that some would defend such actions. How can you do so?

How do you reconcile the character of God with these Old Testament commands?

A Conversation about My Blog

"'This Blog is 100% Zombie Proof'?" my wife asked, pointing at the new banner logo in my sidebar.

"You don't think that I'm overestimating that figure, do you?" I asked, concerned.

"No," she responded. "It's just a strange thing to put on your blog."

"Well, I've been pretty serious lately, writing about sacramental theology and such. And since Bishop Schnase was probably going to read my blog if only to get a look at his Methodist Blogger Profile, I decided to put up that banner. I wouldn't want him to fall under the mistaken impression that I'm a serious Methodist commentator."

"That's my husband," she said with a giggle, "Only you could see being taken seriously as a liability."

An Engineer's Guide to Cats

[YouTube Link] Two engineers explain the functions, dynamics, and behaviors of cats.

HT: Neatorama

A Six-Word Motto for the UMC

Jeremy Smith has a great post up that references a recent contest that the authors of Freakanomics held to give the United States a new motto. The winner was "Our Worst Critics Prefer to Stay." It was a cute jab at some elements of the political Left. Noam Chomsky immediately sprung to mind when I read it. But Jeremy Smith takes that motto and applies it very cleverly to the United Methodist Church, and one that applies to both the Left and the Right in our denomination. He writes in agreement with a recent commentator who rejected with the notion that General Conference should sit out the homosexuality debate this time:

My friends, in the UMC, Our Worst Critics Prefer to Stay. Unity in diversity is the best way forward to be forced to examine the issues. Breaking apart and schizm leads us to our own echo chambers where we will not have to deal with diversity again. And for the sake of our own discipleship, keep on these divisive issues, because by ignoring them, our outward appearance is happy, but our souls are rotten.

UPDATE: Jeff the Baptist nails it in the comments:

The problem is that with the UMC, the worst critics may be staying, but lots of other people aren't.

Interference

[Video Link] A short film about cheating fate and death by Justin Cale Martinez. 10 minutes long.

The Consecration of the Sacraments

In continuation of our previous discussion: this is the difficulty I see in the practice of a layperson bringing communion elements to an elder and having the elder "bless" them and then the layperson taking them off to administer them to others. Or, for that matter, the elder blessing the elements over the phone or by e-mail:

It strongly implies that the elder has the mystical ability to make bread and grape juice into the body and blood of Christ. The principle actor in the sacrament thus ceases to be God, and instead becomes the elder.

And that's bad sacramental theology.

Another problem is this: if the blessing of the elements makes it an effective sacrament, could not elders "bless" water and then send that water off with a layperson for the layperson to administer the sacrament of baptism? There is an inconsistency in United Methodist practice that we consider one sacrament to be effective in the activity and one to be effective in the elements.

At any rate, one of the principle duties of an elder is to ensure that the sacraments are "duly administered", and I would think that this would be difficult if s/he isn't, you know, administering them.

As I've said, the Discipline says something, I say "Yessir" and I do it. But I think that we need to clarify exactly what we think "consecration" means in the United Methodist understanding of Eucharist.

The Voices In Your Head

see more crazy cat pics

Elders and the "Blessing" of Eucharistic Elements

I've previously written of my disapproval of the practice of elders "blessing" bread and grape juice so that these may be served as the Eucharist by laypeople to others far away from the elder. It treats Holy Communion like magic, not a means of grace, and suggests that the elder is a sorcerer, not a priest.

But while doing my commissioning paperwork over the past two weeks, I noticed that ¶ 340.2.a.5 not only endorses this practice, but requires it from elders. Among the duties of an elder in full connection are:

To select and train deacons and lay members to serve consecrated communion elements.

So it would appear that what I considered bad sacramental practice is, in fact, the official teaching of the United Methodist Church. Hmm.

UPDATE: Follow-up post here.

Caption Contest

Picture via IHAHD

Previous contest winners

WINNER: Matt: Man, I've gotta get this thing removed. All it does is drink and stare at the computer all day.

Fire as an Anti-Zombie Weapon

Say Uncle writes in favor of the flame-thrower as an anti-zombie weapon.

NO! NO! NO!

To kill a zombie, you must destroy the brain. Fire does not do that until it burns through the skull. The freakin' skull, people! That's a long, long time. Meanwhile, you're staggering, burning undead pal has managed to set you on fire. And you're not as durable as a zombie.

Say Uncle also advocates the chainsaw under certain circumstances:

But, if you’re engaging zombies at close range, a chain saw is a much better weapon assuming you can somehow get into a position where the zombies are channeled in to you one at a time. A decapitated zombie is a friendly zombie.

I've used the bait-and-funnel technique myself, but never with a chainsaw. Consider this: (1) with a chainsaw, you need at least seven seconds with each zombie (2) the blood splatter of a chainsaw vastly increases the opportunity for contamination (3) using a chainsaw lets the zombie get within grabbing distance of you and (4) chainsaws are heavy. After twenty or so decapitations, your arms will be ready to drop.

Stick to repeating rifles. If you must use a melee weapon, choose a Shaolin spade. Or a sharp katana. Or even a baseball bat. Anything but a chainsaw, for crying out loud. That may work in the movies, but not in real life.

HT: Instapundit

George Takei Singing "On the Road Again"

[YouTube Link] The first commentor who can identify the subtle joke of Takei's song selection wins a kiss from Jeff the Baptist.

You can also listen to Leonard Nimoy's "The Ballad of Bilbo Baggins" and William Shatner rapping from Shakespeare's Julius Caesar. That if, if you want to. If you really, really want to.

HT: Ace

Methodist Blogger Profile: Bishop Robert Schnase

Robert Schnase of Five Practices
Robert Schnase is Bishop of the Missouri Area of the United Methodist Church.

Why do you blog?
My reason is pretty simple: I’m using every possible means to strengthen congregations in the task of changing lives in the spirit of Christ, to encourage pastors and laity in their ministry, and to foster conversations about adapting our approaches toward ministry to meet the extraordinary and changing challenges of our age. This drives my speaking, my teaching, my writing, my publishing, and now my blogging.

What has been your best blogging experience?
I’ve been surprised at how frequently an idea sparked by a blog conversation gets bounced around the blogosphere, copied and recopied, improved upon and used somehow. Several times as I’ve visited a small remote rural church, I’ve had someone come up and comment on a blog entry I wrote a few weeks before. And I’ve been amazed at the diverse backgrounds, regions, denominations, ages, and faith perspectives of those who enter the conversations at times. My best experience is the sense of connection and conversation that blogging fosters.

What would be your main advice to a novice blogger?
Tell your Mom and Dad how to find your blog, so you get at least a few hits each week!

If you could only read three blogs a day, what would they be?
I have to confess that I don’t regularly read many blogs. (Sorry!) Instead, I search around from time to time for particular topics. The blogs that interest me most are not written by other bishops or national church leaders, but by younger pastors, seminary students, and faithful laity sharing their experiences, frustrations, hopes, and practices for ministry. I also check out blogs from other denominations, from authors, and from political commentators. I particularly appreciate blogs that are more essay-oriented, literary, and/or thought-provoking rather than the daily dairy types. (Not that there’s anything wrong with it!)

Who are your spiritual heroes?
Among writers, the most influential in my life over the years has been Deitrich Bonhoeffer, followed perhaps by Henri Nouwen. Among church leaders, I’d list some early mentors and colleagues who have encouraged me, taught me, challenged me, and supported me. Since some of these are contemporaries of mine—pastors and laity I’ve worked with over the last twenty years---I hesitate to name them. And then there are the people who are my most cherished spiritual heroes, and those tend to be people I’ve known who work in missions, social services, and in hands-on service ministries directly with the poor, the hungry, the desperate, the imprisoned, the ill. Day after day these persons live out the faith in direct contact with the people who face the most intractable and hopeless situations in places most of us only visit for a few days for mission projects. If most of us are unwilling to engage this work personally, we at least ought to offer our absolute and unending support from the positions we hold to help make their work effective and fruitful.

What are you reading at the moment?
For church and work, I’m reading Martha Grace Reese’s stuff: Unbinding the Gospel, the Heart, etc. And I’m reading Adam Hamilton’s Seeing Gray in a World of Black and White and Richard Horsley’s Jesus and Empire. For fun, I’m starting the new John Grisham book, and I’ve just picked up a new Koontz novel. Also I’m reading through a book on the Owls of North America and just finished Mark Adams’ Chasing Birds Across Texas.

What is your favorite hymn and why?
“Be Thou My Vision” and “Praise to the Lord, the Almighty” I just like ‘em.

Can you name a major moral, political, or intellectual issue on which you've ever changed your mind?
Most of my views, rightly or wrongly, have remained fairly consistent over my adult life, even as they’ve matured and become more nuanced and more deeply textured.

What philosophical thesis do you think is most important to combat?
Material wealth and acquisitiveness as the source of happiness. And celebrity as a value separated from achievement or contribution.

If you could effect one major change in the governing of your country, what would it be?
A way out of Iraq that does not lead to even worse consequences than remaining.

If you could effect one major policy change in the United Methodist Church?
Where do I start? I’m sorry…I don’t just have one. 1. Simplify and streamline the discernment/candidacy/probationary/ordination process. 2. Modify the Guaranteed Appointment so that clergy deployment always serves missional purposes. 3. Make it easier to close some churches and realign resources toward growing and emergent populations. 4. Maximize contextual organizational flexibility at the local church, conference, and general church level to make us more agile, quick to respond, and able to address a quickly changing environment. 5. And many others too numerous or controversial to mention here! And none of them include requiring every church and pastor to read my book!

What would be your most important piece of advice about life?
Focus on the fruit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

What, if anything, do you worry about?
In general, I’m not a worrier. I don’t lose many nights of sleep over work or personal or global issues. But I do have some deep concerns….some are personal and family-related, and some have to do with the direction we are going as a society. I’m deeply concerned about the environment, our use of resources, global warming, etc. I drive a hybrid, contribute to a variety of environmental action groups, and support a number of legislative initiatives intended to develop national and international policies that protect the environment. And I am deeply concerned about the tone and tenor of the debate about immigration. I don’t presume to have all the answers, but I think the intermingling of terrorism fears, national security, and immigration policy has been hurtful to our highest ideals as a country. And I’m deeply concerned about the war in Iraq, and the extraordinarily difficult choices ahead and their implications.

If you were to relive your life to this point, is there anything that you'd do differently?
I would spend more time with my kids while they were little. (“Let those with ears, hear!”)

Where would you most like to live (other than where you do now)?
I enjoy were I live now, and have always felt I’m adaptable enough to live just about anywhere. But I love South Texas, West Texas, and Central America.

What do you like doing in your spare time?
Running. Walking. Birding. Spending the maximum amount of time each day outdoors in sunlight as I possibly can. And bird photography (see www.pbase.com/mobish)

What is your most treasured possession?
The love of a few close friends.

What talent would you most like to have?
Music. Any type….piano, guitar, singing. But just don’t have it.

If you could have any three people, past or present, to dinner, who would they be?
The easy and predictable answer would include names like Martin Luther King, Jr., Mother Teresa, or Ghandi. Others might predict the Apostle Paul or John Wesley. (Truth be told, I don’t think either of those two would be much fun at a dinner party!) I certainly would have no trouble filling a dinnertime and evening with questions I have for Jesus, and questions I’m sure Jesus has for me. But my truthful answer is far more mundane. Three of my four grandparents died before I was born or while I was a very young child, and I wish I could get to know them. So I’d invite them…people I’ve never known except in the stories, expressions, and love of my parents.

Methodist Blogs Weekly Roundup #152

...is up.

Is the District Superintendency Reserved for the Least Effective Clergy?

Rev. J speculates to that effect. It would certainly be the Dilbert Principle at work. Do I agree? No, I'm not that cynical about the United Methodist Church. Not yet, at least.

HT: David Hallum

Question of the Day

¶ 17 of The Book of Discipline (2004) constitutes the First Restrictive Rule. It reads:

The General Conference shall not revoke, alter, or change our Articles of Religion or establish any new standards or rules of doctrine contrary to our present existing and established standards of doctrine.

¶ 102 (p.70) includes Wesley's Sermons as among the doctrinal standards of the United Methodist Church:

In the Plan of Union for The United Methodist Church, the preface to the Methodist Articles of Religion and the Evangelical United Brethren Confession of Faith explains that both were accepted as doctrinal standards for the new church. Additionally, it stated that although the language of the first Restrictive Rule never has been formally defined, Wesley's Sermons and Notes were understood specifically to be included in our present existing and established standards of doctrine.

In his sermon "The Cure and Cause for Earthquakes", Wesley argues that earthquakes are caused by divine wrath for sin, and they are preventable by repenting of our sins.

Are United Methodist pastors required to teach that earthquakes are caused by sin and cured by repentance?

Methodist Blogger Profile: Larry Oksten

Larry Oksten of Forever in Blue Jeans


I am married to Ginny, who is my best friend, and we have two boys…Kyle and David. I am a third career pastor. I was a Respiratory Therapist, which is where I met my wife. I was then a computer programmer for IBM. I went to Eastern Baptist Theological Seminary. I am a HUGE Philly Sports fan, especially the Eagles and Phillies. I am scheduled to be ordained in May. And finally, I believe the church is at its best when we are out in the world taking care of the least, last, and lost.

Why do you blog?
I started blogging because I needed to be more disciplined and I also have been convinced from an early age that I would be a great writer some day. This tied these two interests together for me. Although I now know that the great American writer thing is probably out of the question.

What has been your best blogging experience?
Actually being able to walk up to a colleague as we were about to start our Ordination interviews and saying “Hey I am PastorBlueJeans”. It has given me a connection to people in a different and very cool way.

What would be your main advice to a novice blogger?
Do it because you want to, not because there is a “need” for YOUR ideas on the internet. I have only recently really got into a flow with blogging and it is because I truly have an idea of what I want to say. In the end, you do this for you and it does not matter if one person reads it or one hundred do. Although I must say it is very nice to read comments from people to know that someone is ACTUALLY reading!

If you could only read three blogs a day, what would they be?
This changes from week to week but I think in a pinch it would be
http://thebiglead.com/ (I love Sports!)
http://locustsandhoney.blogspot.com/ (I know, I know it seems like pandering…but I really love the views and the resulting comments)
http://blog.wired.com/wiredscience/ Recently I have found this site just what I need to feed my mind.

Who are your spiritual heroes?
John Wesley, the more I read and the more I know about him the more I understand I am Wesleyan for a reason.

Dr Craig Keener. A professor of mine from Eastern Baptist Theological Seminary (now Palmer). He taught me so much but he tied passion and scholarship and Spirituality together in an incredible way for me.

My Granny- She taught me at an early age about what I now view as a theology of relationship

What are you reading at the moment?
Red Letter Christians Tony Campolo
The Nine (Inside the Secret World of the Supreme court) Jeffrey Toobin
Obsession Jonathan Kellerman

What is your favorite hymn and why?
UMH #593 Here I am Lord – Because it was the first and remains one of the only Hymns that makes me cry every time I sing it. It is so powerful and meaningful to me and my walk with the Lord.

Can you name a major moral, political, or intellectual issue on which you've ever changed your mind?
Yes I can, several in fact. So for the sake of brevity I will list but a few. My view on abortion has changed completely in the last 10 years. I am , what I consider to be very pro-life, but all life, the unborn and the born. This also ties into another issues that I have changed my mind on and my final position is still evolving but I find myself moving more and more closely to a “war is bad” view. I am right now in the just war camp but am trying to determine what makes for a “just” war.

What philosophical thesis do you think is most important to combat?
I would like to combat the belief that seems to exist in much of America that we are the most important nation in the world. It is a belief that we are the chosen nation. It creeps into our politics and our religious beliefs and it is dangerous.

If you could effect one major change in the governing of your country, what would it be?
I believe the country needs a viable third party. The two party system is not working for us presently.

If you could effect one major policy change in the United Methodist Church, what would it be?
I believe the episcopacy needs to be changed. I believe a term limit system would be very beneficial for the church

What would be your most important piece of advice about life?
Life is adventure that is meant to be shared in community. We need each other.

What, if anything, do you worry about?
I worry that about my boys, I hope and pray that I am being a good father to them and providing them with what they need. I also worry that I am being faithful with the gifts that God has given me.

If you were to relive your life to this point, is there anything that you'd do differently?
Probably not. I have made some mistakes but they have all led me to the life I have now and the wonderful family and friends that I have now.

Where would you most like to live (other than where you do now)?
At our cottage in the South Seaville Camp Meeting

What do you like doing in your spare time?
Read, Cook, Watch the Philadelphia Eagles

What is your most treasured possession?
Not a possession at all, but my wife. She is my world. All I have is simply better because she is with me.

What talent would you most like to have?
I have always wanted to be able to shoot webs like Spiderman. It would make travelling to the conference office so much easier.

If you could have any three guests, past or present, to dinner, who would they be?
Martin Luther King Jr.,
Mac Powell(Third Day is one of the reasons I am a pastor),
Jackie Robinson

Qapla'!

1. Yes
2. No, but only because my Church Council doesn't consider it to be a "legitimate reimbursable expense" and I had to return it.
3. Yes

Thanks to Ironic Catholic for reminding me of the great webcomic Savage Chickens.

Celebrity D&D Characters

A great list. Here's Stephen Hawking's character sheet stats:

25th-Level Cosmologist

Neutral Good Human

Strength: 3

Dexterity: 2

Constitution: 10

Intelligence: 28

Wisdom: 20

Charisma: 12

Special Abilities: Time dilation at will, and Hawking Radiation. Any nongenius within a 60-foot radius take 10d6 radiation damage. Base movement: 6 ft/round

Special Equipment: Wheelchair of translation.

HT: Neatorama

The Institution of the Sabbath

see more crazy cat pics

A Joke

Q. Why did Jesus wait until he was 30 years old before starting his ministry?

[Answer in the first comment]

Caption Contest

Picture via Ironic Catholic

Previous contest winners

WINNERS:

DannyG: ...but wait 'til you meet the Church Ladies!!!

Brett Royal: NO TRESPASSING

Pastor Dave: "Yes, this is Pastor Jones, I'd like your address. I have a few members to refer to your church."

Question of the Day

Pastors, have you ever provided pastoral care to a person facing trial and/or incarceration? How should such an ordeal be handled by a pastor?

This Reminds Me of Annual Conference in So Many Ways

Video Link

Question of the Day

What is the best Law and Order series?
	Law and Order: Original Series
	Law and Order: Special Victims Unit
	Law and Order: Criminal Intent
	Law and Order: Trial by Jury
pollcode.com free polls

New Bible

After being a Christian for about six years, I've reached that particular milestone: my Bible is now falling apart. For sentimental reasons, it's quite near and dear to me (e.g. my wedding is recorded in it). But it's really getting unusable.

This Bible is a NASB Study Bible, which incorporates the 1971 NAS translation with the study notes from the NIV Study Bible.

I've decided that I want to acquire a leather-bound NRSV to replace it, which I will use most often for personal devotions and preaching. The most handy features of my current Bible are the thumb-index on the side of the pages and the extensive verse references in the margins. The study notes aren't useful anymore, and some I find quite misleading. It would be nice to have personal reflection questions and comments in the place of study notes in order to deepen my devotional reading.

I want the NRSV because I'm no longer sold about the reliability of the NASB. And the NRSV is the unofficial translation of the UMC, so I'd better start adopting it across the board.

Art and Ideology

Will Deuel has an intriguing post up in which he muses about the intersection between art, ideology, music and homiletics. At the end, he ponders several questions:

1. Is the sermon an art form?

2. If so, is the art best served by being in tune with my own deepest passions, desires, fears, hopes, dreams?

3. Is the art well served by being in tune with the congregation’s deepest passions, etc.?

4. Am I guilty of preparing art in the service of ideology rather than passion?

New Project for the Methoblogosphere

Gavin has the details. I'll try to participate over the summer.

14 Old Testament Ways to Get a Wife

For the single men among you, this may be helpful. For married men among you, the last may still be helpful.

HT: Richard Hall

Moral Victories

In an excellent post, Allan Bevere writes that Christians should reject the concept of "moral victories":

Moral victory is the consolation prize, if it can be called that. It is another way of saying that it doesn't matter whether we win or lose, it's how we play the game. I cannot remember who said it, but I think it is closer to the truth to state, "It doesn't matter whether we win or lose... until we lose." One of my favorite theologians, Vince Lombardi said, "Show me a guy who believes all that stuff about moral victory, and I'll show you someone who has played too many games without his helmet."

One thing we learn from the Bible is that God is not into winning moral victories; God is into winning real victories. When God comes to Moses in the flames of the burning bush in order to call him to service, God plans to actually free his people from slavery in Egypt. Is it possible to imagine God settling for a moral victory of a well played, but failed attempt of the Israelites to be free from the clutches of Pharaoh? Can one imagine, that as God's people are worshiping the golden calf in the wilderness of Sinai, God in despair says to Moses on the mountain, "Well at least we gave it the old college try. Perhaps it is time to cut our losses and be happy we made it this far."

When one traces the biblical narrative from Genesis through Revelation, it is clear that God is bound and determined to get God's way; that God is going to set the world to rights, and he will settle for nothing less. Moral victory is not in the plan of the Almighty.

Question of the Day

If you could change one thing in the United Methodist Social Principles, what would it be?

Death Seeks Out Gary Gygax

From the great web comic xkcd.

HT: Benaform

Caption Contest

Picture via Miss Cellania at Neatorama

Previous contest winner

WINNERS:

Mark Winter: SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: Criticizing Lord Vader's smoking habit may result in mysterious choking and premature death

Ed Kross: To prove his total allegiance to the dark side, in addition to picking up smoking Vader destroyed all hybrid tie fighters and forbade recycling on all star destroyers.

417 Rules of Awesomely Bold Leadership

A parody of popular Christian leadership books.

Hat tip to someone, but I can't remember who.

Clerical Adrenalin

Christopher Gudger-Raines is missing some adrenal rush in his life:

I don't want adrenaline 24/7. I understand and glorify God for the fact that my demeanor is appropriate for the nursing home and shut-in visits. I have felt important after a sermon and I do "get up" for Bible study. But it would be nice if I had one preacherly task that required a helmet. I think I could grow in important ways through some dangerous-because-it's-that-important-work. Maybe I'll get the buzz cut--just to remind me of those who live on the edge...the good edge. Do I need the Ray-bans, too?