Thursday, January 03, 2008

The Wrong Choice: Beth Quick

Beth Quick wants to be named United Methodist of the Year.

This, despite her
shady connections to Colombian drug cartels.

What's wrong with the Quick candidacy?
  • 55 million Americans are zombies, but Beth Quick has no plan to provide coverage from them.

  • Beth Quick voiced her approval for's full page advertisement questioning Admiral Ackbar's patriotism.

  • If Beth Quick's environmental protection plans were enacted, spice production would drop by a third within four years.

Beth Quick: wrong on zombies. Wrong on defense. Wrong on the environment.

Wrong for Methodism.


Scotte Hodel said...

The spice must flow.

John said...

Will the spice flow if Beth wins?

Can we take that risk?

gavin richardson said...

hmm.. 55 millions of americans might be zombies.. hmm...

David said...

But, where does she stand on The Final Frontier?

Elizabeth said...

I'm shocked that you would resort to attack ads and smear campaigns. I'm trying to keep my campaign positive. But obviously your post means you feel I'm a strong contender for the win. I can handle being the front runner....

John said...

David wrote:

But, where does she stand on The Final Frontier?

Like all God-fearing, patriotic Americans, I hold that it is non-canonical.

But Beth...well, you're just have to ask her yourself. If she'll stop dodging the question.

Oloryn said...

Y'know, as a fairly conservative Christian, I kind of liked Final Frontier, once it was over. You've got this New-Agey Vulcan claiming to be leading people to God, who leads them to a creature who far more resembles the devil (or, given that it's stuck behind a barrier, perhaps more akin to Morgoth). And it's not McCoy's emotionalism, nor Spock's logic, but the plain, ordinary-man common-sense of Kirk that initially spots the problem. The symbolism, at least, is useful.