Wednesday, December 19, 2007

UMC Struggles to Produce LOLcat Worship Materials

Nashville, TN -- The United Methodist Publishing House, the publisher and distributor of media for the United Methodist Church, has been struggling to keep up with rising demand for materials published in LOLcat.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 3% of American households now speak LOLcat as their primary language. Fully 11 million Americans claim it as their first language.

"What concerns us," Neil Alexander, publisher and president of the organization said in a telephone interview, "is that four million American residents speak LOLcat, but lack functional fluency in English. And until recently, the United Methodist Church had no worship tools written in LOLcat."

This problem, Alexander stated, is diminishing as the UMPH has now released a LOLcat-language version of the 1988 United Methodist Hymnal. It includes classic hymns like Great Is Thy Faithfulness, which in LOLcat is expressed as "grat iz thy faithfulnes o ceiling cat mah fathr thar iz no shadoh ov turnin wif thee."

When asked about publishing a LOLcat Bible, Alexander stated that due to translation costs, LOLcat-speaking United Methodists should continue using the 1997 translation produced by Augsburg Fortress.

"Our next priority is to provide the upcoming 2008 Discipline in LOLcat, which shall be invaluable to evangelism efforts with the LOLcat community," Alexander said.

News of the new hymnal delighted the Rev. Whiskers of the LOL Mishun in Oakland, California. "teh gospel wil rech al kats nao kthxbai."
funny pictures

4 comments:

gavin richardson said...

that is because the publishing house lacks vision to hire people or allow their current staff to live outside their traditional box.

&:~)

Ken L. Hagler said...

John,
Thanks for reporting on this! I'm with Gavin, it is indeed a sad day when we have no compassion to reach out to this people group. What has become of us!?!?

May the Farce Be with You!
Jedi Pastor Ken

Mark Winter said...

I THANK CEILIN CAT 4 SUCH AN INCLUSIV DENOMINASHUN

gavin richardson said...

the LOL is my parish